History proves that many prophets were hostile to their own families. Noah was hostile to his wife and children. Prophet Lut (p.s.) was also not followed by his wife. Ibrahim was not followed by his father. Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was also hated and hostile to his uncles. The facts also show, many boarding schools are santrinya from far away areas. His right-hand neighbor didn't want to wait. Not even a little hostile. 

This phenomenon has been conveyed by the Prophet (saw). The people who hate and stay away from the most are their families and neighbors. Alim people who are truly ma'rifat billah, only oriented to seek the pleasure of Allah SWT, always uphold and convey the truth, never violate the law of Allah SWT. For the sake of truth he dared to be hated by the crowd. It's all the character of a person who is really alim and has courage. 

He is a ma'rifat to Allah SWT, knows something that Allah SWT has, understands the truth according to Allah SWT and when believing it all he practices, conveys and disseminates it at various risks. 

Some accept, some refuse, some like and some don't like. It's all the attitude and mentality of a truly pious person. And the one who does not dare to take effect for his behavior is not alim, but timid. So, a truly faithful and righteous person will not be afraid except to Allah SWT. 

Two Consequences of Human Attitude

Alim people who by religion are required to think, believe, knowledge, act, behave, and make such decisions, namely always oriented to seek the pleasure of Allah SWT has two consequences, hated and favored by humans. And the first man hated it sometimes from his family, his wife. And this is in accordance with allah's warning in the Qur'an, "O you who believe, indeed among your wives and your children there are enemies to you. Therefore be careful." (QS. At-Taghabun 14). 

Nevertheless, if indeed he is alim, strong character, he will always fight which sometimes his wife and family are a hindrance. So was the da'wah carried out by the Prophet (peace be upon him). Once the prophet's wives protested with the actions of the Prophet ,less noticed, often left behind and so on. Same with the wives of the priests. 

When the Prophet (peace be upon him) protested by his wives, the Qur'an told the Prophet to oppose him, "O Prophet, say to your wives, if you want the life of the world and its jewels, then come here I will give you mut'ah and I will divorce you well." Al-Ahzab 28). 

Therefore, from the beginning the prospective scholars if looking for a wife choose the moral, scientific and religious factors. Moreover, look for the good ones. Don't get married because of her wealth, her beauty and her rank. If the prospective cleric is wrong in choosing a future wife, then his wife will not support the struggle of Islam. Not fighting is sinful, ashamed of his teacher and when fighting the wife is not supportive. For the anticipation of that, then from the beginning in choosing the future wife is in accordance with the Qur'an and Sunnah. 

Allah (SWT) said, "If the prophet divorces you, may his Lord replace him with a wife better than you, who obeys, believes, ta'at, repents, worshipers, always fasts whether widow or virgin." (QS. At-Tahrim: 5) 

This verse explains the criteria of a good wife. Among them have a self-surrender mentality, hold Islam firmly, faith and trust in Allah SWT, be zuhud, diligent worship, if wrong immediately repent, diligent fasting. If our future wife has this criterion, then widows and virgins are all good. This is all aimed at when we struggle to get support from wives and families. Because the prophet muhammad (peace be upon him) said the one who hated the cleric was his wife, family and neighbors and this is very much we encounter in the community. (mu/cashmere)